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Consciousness

3 Subjects Schools Should Teach To Improve The World

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Children spend a vast portion of their lives inside educational institutions. From a very young age, we are put into schools and told how the world works, learning to absorb information rather than question it over the course of many years. We memorize enormous amounts of information, much of it irrelevant to our future lives, with the goal of acquiring the credentials necessary for us to find our place in this world. All of this, quite often, leaves us incapable of thinking critically, and while there are admittedly many positive aspects of modern day education, the drawbacks do appear to outnumber the benefits (at least in my opinion). I believe it is these issues within the education system which are inspiring more and more parents to choose alternative forms of school for their children.

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One of the main issues with the education system is its lack of relevancy and real-world practicality. Children are rarely taught the kinds of skills which will most benefit them in their adult lives, and accordingly feel lost after they emerge from the education system, paper diploma in hand. It would be great to see schools begin to implement other subjects into the curriculum beyond those most commonly found in academia — subjects which help the child deal with and develop their inner selves rather than smother them with pharmaceuticals.  Children have become a massive source of profit for the pharmaceutical industry, and we need to start addressing this issue at the root, treating the causes of children’s distress and not the effects.

Below are three subjects which should be included in every curriculum.

Meditation

This one really is a no brainer, and it should be implemented into school curriculums for various reasons. One of those reasons is health, and the benefits in this area are well established in scientific literature. An eight week study conducted by Harvard researchers at Massachusetts General Hospital (MGH), for example, recently determined that the brain will literally begin to rebuild itself in just 8 weeks. It’s the very first study to document that meditation produces changes over time in the brain’s grey matter, and you can access that study and read more about it here.

Another example comes from a study conducted by researchers at John Hopkins. They found that just eight weeks of meditation training was as effective as medication in treating anxiety, depression, and pain.

According to The Art of Living, which is an educational and humanitarian movement engaged in stress-management and service initiatives, these techniques could improve intuition, enhance sensory abilities, improve awareness and foresight, increase confidence, remove the fear of the unknown, and increase creativity and intelligence. They’ve seen this through their own experience, and through the immense success of their program, which could easily be replicated by schools.

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Dealing With Emotions

Our emotions are a constant presence, and dealing with them appropriately is essential to success in everyday life. Managing our emotions is not, however, something we are taught in school as children. Humans are complex animals, but mainstream education ignores much of that complexity, instead focusing on learning and regurgitating information in order to get good grades and find a job. Because of this, children miss out on important developmental growth, which is why many adults today also lack such skills. Meditation can be a great tool for dealing with one’s emotions, and it’s important for schools to reflect a need for this kind of personal development in their curricula. If these faculties of a child’s physiology are left unchecked, it can lead to a host of developmental and behavioural problems within the classroom.

It can also lead to physiological problems as well. Scientists over at the HeartMath institute have studied how different emotions create physiological benefits in your body. Did you know, for example, that you can boost your immune system by conjuring up positive emotions? Or that negative emotions can create nervous system chaos, and that positive emotions do the complete opposite? They’ve shown that the heart can actually send signals to the brain, the nature of which depends on the person’s emotional state; they can both help or hinder our nervous system. The heart beats out the largest electromagnetic field in the body, and information is encoded into this electromagnetic field depending on how we feel. This can affect the people around us as well. This research demonstrates just a few of many reasons why managing our emotions is essential to our health and happiness.

Another predicament that plagues mainstream education is its insistence on directing children rather than letting them direct themselves. Children are often unable to discover their interests and don’t have enough time outside of school and homework to engage them once they have determined what they are. This also creates a host of emotional issues, as many children are forced into career paths which do not excite them. The very act of being in school prevents many from even knowing what they are passionate about. Dr. Kelly M. Flanagan, a clinical psychologist, explains just how detrimental this enforced obedience can be:

When we can’t say ‘No,’ we become a sponge for the feelings of everyone around us and we eventually become saturated by the needs of everyone else while our own hearts wilt and die. We begin to live our lives according to the forceful should of others, rather than the whispered, passionate want of our own hearts. We let everyone else tell us what story to live and we cease to be the author of our own lives. We lose our voice — we lose the desire planted in our souls and the very unique way in which we might live out that desire in the world. We get used by the world instead of being useful in the world. (source)

We seem to have created one of the worst possible environments for our children. They spend most of their childhood lives in educational institutions, for hours every day, being told what to do, how to do it, and, occasionally, why it needs to be done. Then they do the same thing in post-secondary education, and again in the workplace. Children may be learning some things of value, but they are also learning something highly concerning — obedience and conformity. While children are busy growing up and trying to find their place in the world, they do so with the knowledge that they will have to find a job and ‘conform’ in some way, shape, or form. As a result, many of us fail to listen to our own intuition and desires. We become deeply unhappy.

Implementing strategies or even full courses on how children can learn to deal with their emotions will be a crucial step for mainstream education to take if it wants to move forward, see improvement, and help children develop into complete, functioning, and happy human beings.

 Proper Nutrition

This is a big one, especially since food today faces many issues which were absent just one or two generations ago. Today much of our food is genetically modified and sprayed with harmful pesticides. While countries in Europe are banning as well as publishing studies showing the potential negative health/environmental effects of GMOs, North America is teaching children that GMOs are necessary to combat climate change and global hunger. (For more info, read “Why 19 countries in Europe just Banned GMOs.”)

The GMO debate aside, schools are littered with processed, unhealthy foods, featuring vending machines filled with disease-causing sugar and cafeterias filled with junk food. This not only contributes to the epidemics of obesity and disease which plague the Western world, the United States in particular, but also sets children up for a lifetime of nutritional deficiencies and poor eating habits. Classes about proper nutrition and global food issues are woefully lacking in the education system. Even when they do exist — and are not mandatory, which they should be — they rely food guides released by the government, which have been paid for by the food industry and whose recommendations have been proven to be problematic.

Proper nutrition is obviously vital for children’s mental stamina and focus and their emotional and physiological health. The bottom line is, school lunches today are setting kids up for a wide range of diseases as they enter into adulthood. We as a society are then paying both the literal and figurative costs of this neglect.

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Consciousness

Scientists Show How Gratitude Literally Alters The Human Heart & Molecular Structure Of The Brain

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In Brief

  • The Facts:

    Scientists have discovered that feelings of gratitude can actually change your brain. Feeling gratitude can also be a great tool for overcoming depression and anxiety. Furthermore, scientists have discovered that the heart sends signals to the brain.

  • Reflect On:

    Every time we struggle with depression, why are we constantly encouraged to take prescription medication when mindfulness techniques actually show more promise?

Gratitude is a funny thing. In some parts of the world, somebody who gets a clean drink of water, some food, or a worn out pair of shoes can be extremely grateful. Meanwhile, somebody else who has all the necessities they need to live can be found complaining about something. What we have today is what we once wanted before, but there is a lingering belief out there that obtaining material possessions is the key to happiness. Sure, this may be true, but that happiness is temporary. The truth is that happiness is an inside job.

It’s a matter of perspective, and in a world where we are constantly made to feel like we are lacking and always ‘wanting’ more, it can be difficult to achieve or experience actual happiness. Many of us are always looking toward external factors to experience joy and happiness, when really it’s all related to internal work. This is something science is just starting to grasp as well, as shown by research coming out of UCLA’s Mindfulness Awareness Research Center. According to them:

Having an attitude of gratitude changes the molecular structure of the brain, keeps gray matter functioning, and makes us healthier and happier. When you feel happiness, the central nervous system is affected. You are more peaceful, less reactive and less resistant. Now that’s a really cool way of taking care of your well-being.

There are many studies showing that people who count their blessings tend to be far happier and experience less depression.  For one study,  researchers recruited people with mental health difficulties, including people suffering from anxiety and depression. The study involved nearly 300 adults who were randomly divided into three groups. This study came from the University of California, Berkeley.

All groups received counselling services, but the first group was also instructed to write one letter of gratitude to another person every week for three weeks, whereas the second group was asked to write about their deepest thoughts and feelings about negative experiences. The third group did not do any writing activity.

What did they find? Compared to the participants who wrote about negative experiences or only received counselling, those who wrote gratitude letters reported significantly better mental health for up to 12 weeks after the writing exercise ended.

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This suggests that gratitude writing can be beneficial not just for healthy, well-adjusted individuals, but also for those who struggle with mental health concerns. In fact, it seems, practicing gratitude on top of receiving psychological counseling carries greater benefits than counseling alone, even when that gratitude practice is brief. (source)

Previously, a study on gratitude conducted by Robert A. Emmons, Ph.D. at the University of California, Davis and his colleague Mike McCullough at the University of Miami randomly assigned participants to be given one of three tasks. Each week, participants kept a short journal. One group described five things they were grateful for that had occurred in the past week, another group recorded daily troubles from the previous week that displeased them, and the neutral group was asked to list five events or circumstances that affected them, but they were not told whether to focus on the positive or the negative. Ten weeks later, participants in the gratitude group felt better about their lives as a whole and were a full 25 percent happier than the troubled group. They reported fewer health complaints and exercised an average of 1.5 hours more. (source)

Researchers from Berkeley identified how gratitude might actually work on our minds and bodies. They provided four insights from their research suggesting what causes the psychological benefits of gratitude.

  • Gratitude unshackles us from toxic emotions
  • Gratitude helps even if you don’t share it
  • Gratitude’s benefits take time & practice. You might not feel it right away.
  • Gratitude has lasting effects on the brain

The brain part is very interesting. The researchers at Berkeley used an fMRI scanner to measure brain activity while people from each group did a “pay it forward” task.  During the task, the participants were given money by a “nice person.” This person’s only request was that they pass on the money to someone if they felt grateful.

They did this because they wanted to distinguish between actions motivated by gratitude and actions driven by other motivations like obligation, guilt, or what other people think. This is important because you can’t fake gratitude, you actually have to feel it. If you don’t feel grateful or practice trying to feel grateful by taking the necessary steps like keeping a gratitude journal, you may not experience as much joy and happiness.

In a world where emotions aren’t really taught in school and the importance is put on striving for high grades, it’s not abnormal to have difficulty feeling grateful. This is especially understandable if you’ve been brought up in the western world, which is full of consumerism and competition, a world where we’re constantly made to feel we are lacking so we need to strive for more.

Participants were asked to rate how grateful they felt toward the person giving them the money and how much they wanted to pay it forward to a charitable cause as well as how guilty they thought they would feel if they didn’t help.  They were also given questionnaires to measure how grateful they felt in general.

We found that across the participants, when people felt more grateful, their brain activity was distinct from brain activity related to guilt and the desire to help a cause. More specifically, we found that when people who are generally more grateful gave more money to a cause, they showed greater neural sensitivity in the medial prefrontal cortex, a brain area associated with learning and decision making. This suggests that people who are more grateful are also more attentive to how they express gratitude.

Most interestingly, when we compared those who wrote the gratitude letters with those who didn’t, the gratitude letter writers showed greater activation in the medial prefrontal cortex when they experienced gratitude in the fMRI scanner. This is striking as this effect was found three months after the letter writing began. This indicates that simply expressing gratitude may have lasting effects on the brain. While not conclusive, this finding suggests that practicing gratitude may help train the brain to be more sensitive to the experience of gratitude down the line, and this could contribute to improved mental health over time.

It’s also interesting to note that a recent study just discovered a brain network that “gives rise to feelings of gratitude. The study could spur future investigations into how these ‘building blocks’ transform social information into complex emotions.” (source)

What About The Heart?

The work and research above is great, but where do we actually experience these feelings? They are clearly not a product of our brain, they are products of our consciousness, and when we feel them the brain responds.  Researchers are now discovering that the heart also responds and that it might actually be the heart that’s responsible for sending these signals to the brain.

A group of prestigious and internationally recognized leaders in physics, biophysics, astrophysics, education, mathematics, engineering, cardiology, biofeedback, and psychology (among other disciplines) have been doing some brilliant work over at the Institute of HeartMath.

Their work, among many others, has proven that when a person is feeling really positive emotions like gratitude, love, or appreciation, the heart beats out a different message, which determines what kind of signals are sent to the brain.

Not only that, but because the heart beats out the largest electromagnetic field produced in the body, the Institute has been able to gather a significant amount of data.

According to Rolin McCratey, Ph.D, and Director of Research at Heartmath?)

“Emotional information is actually coded and modulated into these fields. By learning to shift our emotions, we are changing the information coded into the magnetic fields that are radiated by the heart, and that can impact those around us. We are fundamentally and deeply connected with each other and the planet itself.” (source)

Another great point made below by the Institute:

“One important way the heart can speak to and influence the brain is when the heart is coherent – experiencing stable, sine-wavelike pattern in its rhythms. When the heart is coherent, the body, including the brain, begins to experience all sorts of benefits, among them are greater mental clarity and ability, including better decision making.” (source)

In fact, the heart actually sends more signals to the brain than the brain sends in return. What’s even more amusing is the fact that these heart signals (from heart to brain) actually have a significant effect on brain function.

Research findings have shown that as we practice heart coherence and radiate love and compassion, our heart generates a coherent electromagnetic wave into the local field environment that facilitates social coherence, whether in the home, workplace, classroom or sitting around a table. As more individuals radiate heart coherence, it builds an energetic field that makes it easier for others to connect with their heart. So, theoretically it is possible that enough people building individual and social coherence could actually contribute to an unfolding global coherence. –  McCratey

So far, the researchers have discovered that the heart communicates with the brain and body in four ways: neurological communication (nervous system), biophysical communication (pulse wave), biochemical communication (hormones), and energetic communication (electromagnetic fields).

“HeartMath research has demonstrated that different patterns of heart activity (which accompany different emotional states) have distinct effects on cognitive and emotional function. During stress and negative emotions, when the heart rhythm pattern is erratic and disordered, the corresponding pattern of neural signals traveling from the heart to the brain inhibits higher cognitive function. This limits our ability to think clearly, remember, learn, reason, and make effective decisions. In contrast, the more ordered and stable pattern of the heart’s input to the brain during positive emotional states has the opposite effect. It facilitates cognitive function and reinforces positive feelings and emotional stability.” (source)

Gratitude and Positive Feelings Can Change The World

It gets deeper:

Every individual’s energy affects the collective field environment. The means each person’s emotions and intentions generate an energy that affects the field. A first step in diffusing societal stress in the global field is for each of us to take personal responsibility for our own energies. We can do this by increasing our personal coherence and raising our vibratory rate, which helps us become more conscious of the thoughts, feelings, and attitudes that we are feeding the field each day. We have a choice in every moment to take to heart the significance of intentionally managing our energies. This is the free will or local freedom that can create global cohesion. – Dr. Deborah Rozman, the President of Quantum Intech (source)

Overall, this type of work suggests that human consciousness in general can change the world.

One study, for example, was done during the Israel-Lebanon war in the 1980s. Two Harvard University professors organized groups of experienced meditators in Jerusalem, Yugoslavia and the United Sates and asked them to focus their attention on the area of conflict at various intervals over a 27-month period. Over the course of the study, the levels of violence in Lebanon decreased between 40 and 80 percent each time a meditating group was in place. The average number of people killed during the war each day dropped from 12 to three, and war-related injuries fell by 70 percent. (source)

Another great example is a study that was conducted in 1993 in Washington, D.C., which showed a 25 percent drop in crime rates when 2,500 meditators meditated during a specific period of time with that intention.

This type of information is heavily correlated with quantum physics, as many experiments in that area as well as parapsychology (telepathy, remote viewing, distant healing) indicate similar findings. (source)

This holds true as far back as 1999. Statistics professor Jessica Utts at UC Irvine published a paper showing that parapsychological experiments have produced much stronger results than those showing a daily dose of aspirin helps prevent heart attacks. Utts also showed that these results are much stronger than the research behind various drugs like antiplatelets.

This type of work has statistically significant implications, yet is heavily ignored and labelled as pseudoscience simply because it conflicts with long-held beliefs we have trouble letting go of … But times are changing.

“For many years I have worked with researchers doing very careful work [in parapsychology], including a year that I spent full-time working on a classified project for the United States government, to see if we could use these abilities for intelligence gathering during the Cold War… At the end of that project I wrote a report for Congress, stating what I still think is true. The data in support of precognition and possibly other related phenomena are quite strong statistically, and would be widely accepted if it pertained to something more mundane. Yet, most scientists reject the possible reality of these abilities without ever looking at data! And on the other extreme, there are true believers who base their beliefs solely on anecdotes and personal experience. I have asked debunkers if there is any amount of data that would convince them, and they generally have responded by saying, “probably not.” I ask them what original research they have read, and they mostly admit that they haven’t read any. Now there is a definition of pseudo-science-basing conclusions on belief rather than data!” – Utts, Chair of the Statistics Department, UC Irvine (Dean Radin, Real Magic)

The Takeaway

Emotions and other factors associated with consciousness have the power to transform our inner world in ways we don’t fully understand yet. These findings show how consciousness can actually transform the physical/material world, and that’s huge. This validates the idea that if we can change our inner world through gratitude, empathy, compassion, and meditation, we can make our outer world more peaceful.

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In order to stay truly independent, we need your help. We are not going to put up paywalls on this website, as we want to get our info out far and wide. For as little as $3 a month, you can help keep CE alive!

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Consciousness

Q Is Not The Answer; Q Is The Question

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In Brief

  • The Facts:

    For many devout followers of the Q movement, it's believed that the fate of our civilization is in the hands of those who are working directly to take down the Deep State, and the ultimate goal is the conviction and punishment of Deep State criminals

  • Reflect On:

    Can we see the Q-anon phenomenon not as the cause but merely as one of many consequences of the 'Great Awakening' humanity is going through?

Let’s assume, for the purposes of this article, that Q-Anon is indeed what a consensus of Q followers believe it to be: an alliance of highly placed people in politics, intelligence, and the military who, in coordination with Donald Trump, are seeking to remove the massive control structure referred to as the Deep State from their seat of power. Even if you are a non-believer of Q, the point of this article will remain the same.

There can be no contesting that the Q movement has galvanized a great number of Americans (and others around the world) who care about the constitution and the rule of law, whom Q refers to as ‘patriots.’ This group of people have found something to believe in. They have great hopes that the criminal and even treasonous behavior that has been going on behind the scenes in every sphere of activity–political, social, economic–will be fully revealed and fully terminated.

Fair enough. But those of us who identify as patriots or truth-seekers have to ask ourselves: Are we personally achieving our part of the mission for which this whole battle with ‘dark forces’ was initially conceived?

The Great Awakening

There is a ‘Great Awakening’ occurring amongst human beings on this planet, make no mistake. And Q often refers to this ‘Great Awakening’ amidst their info drops. But it is important to realize that the Q-Anon phenomenon is not the driver of this ‘Great Awakening,’ but merely one of a multitude of consequences of this awakening. The awakening of humanity at this particular time in history, one which leads to an evolutionary ‘jump,’ an ascension to a higher plane of existence, has been hinted at and prophesied by many of the world’s spiritual traditions going back thousands of years.

Meanwhile, those behind the Q-Anon phenomenon certainly don’t have as long of a history and can be considered as relative latecomers to the unfolding of the overall plan for humanity. This is not to discount the importance of what they are doing: working to reveal the dark dealings of a massive control structure and bringing perpetrators of horrific and treasonous crimes to justice, effectively clearing the way for humanity to move forward in the material world.

However, one must be clear that the ‘Great Awakening’ is not merely the realization that dark actions such as Satanic ritual sacrifice, pedophilia, human experimentation, and mind control have been effectively hidden from our view for centuries, or even that those perpetrating these crimes are going to face the full extent of the law. It is the awakening to the fact that, as individuals, we are truly sovereign beings, and our highest collective aspiration is to manage our civilization without a ruling class or master.

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Human Sovereignty

Many patriots look at Q as their savior and cannot see beyond the moment when justice is served. But the larger question is: When the bloodlines and their minions that have been ruling us since the beginning of known history are suddenly deposed, what will we replace them with? How will the vacuum be filled? Will those military, political and intelligence operatives who see themselves as directly responsible for taking down the Deep State simply assume command? On the basis of what authority? Their own opinions about how the world should be run?

Yes, we have a Constitution, we have moral principles as well as checks and balances around rulership that, if followed, would probably lead to a comfortable life for most. But will we simply be replacing one ruler with another, albeit a bit more benevolent? And will we just stand by and accept a benevolent rulership that gradually devolves as most master/slave relationships do when power begins to corrupt by its very nature? Are we still going to be seeking leadership rather than looking inside ourselves for the golden light of sovereignty?

We have to see that we may be facing a similar challenge that Jesus did two thousand years ago, where he tried his best to explain to people their inherent self-guidance mechanism in following the will of their higher self (the ‘Father’). At that time, few could see Jesus as other than a savior they had to follow word-by-word rather than thinking for themselves and learning from their own experiences. This quandary is humorously illustrated in the following clip from Monty Python’s The Life of Brian.

Brian: Please, please, please listen. I’ve got one or two things to say.
Crowd:  Tell us! Tell us both of them!
Brian: Look, you’ve got it all wrong! You don’t need to follow me. You don’t need to follow anybody! You’ve got to think for yourselves!  You’re all individuals!
Crowd:  Yes! We’re all individuals!
Brian: You’re all different!
Crowd: Yes, we are all different!
Man in crowd: I’m not…
Crowd: Shhh!
Brian: You’ve all got to work it out for yourselves!
Crowd: Yes, we’ve all got to work it out for ourselves!
Brian: Exactly.
Crowd: Tell us more!
Brian: No, that’s the point! Don’t let anyone tell you what to do!

The Takeaway

Many patriots take the famous Q catchphrase ‘Where We Go One We Go All’ to mean that we are united as patriots in the fight against the Deep State criminals. In this way it is a rallying cry for an ‘us versus them’ mentality, where we see ourselves as the ‘good’ fighting against the ‘bad.’ Certainly, there is much in the Q information drops that suggests that this is exactly the way most of the people behind Q see things, and therein lies the limitations. This is why Q is not the answer–certainly not the ultimate answer–to our quest for salvation.

But one thing we can say about the Q drops is that they tend to be inquiries rather than statements of fact, which encourages active participation and fosters mastery over the situation with the calm assurance that everything is under control and in the big picture we will succeed. The design behind Q’s litany of questions may very well be suggesting that in order to go forward, we must all find answers for ourselves.

Another way we can interpret ‘Where We Go One We Go All’ is in the context of all of humanity, where the ultimate plan is for the patriotic and the treasonous, the good and the bad, the oppressed and the oppressors, to all come together as one within the human collective. This will only be possible if we are able to reach for humility and forgiveness, and recognize that as human individuals we are all equally connected to the human darkness that has dominated this planet for so long.

Each one of us must go through our own healing and become self-responsible sovereigns in our own lives. We have to grow past the need to be told what to do and develop a connectedness and an identification with the entirety of the human race. It is when our eyes truly open up and we see ourselves as one and naturally mature into unconditional service to the whole that the next step in the collective evolution of humanity will be realized.

Check out our CE Protocol to understand more about why we must face the darker aspects of our society, and why change truly starts within. 

Help Support Collective Evolution

The demand for Collective Evolution's content is bigger than ever, except ad agencies and social media keep cutting our revenues. This is making it hard for us to continue.

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Consciousness

How To Get Over A Breakup & Stop Thinking About Your Ex

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In Brief

  • The Facts:

    Breakups are a seemingly inevitable part of life. Even if you're lucky enough to have never gone through one chances are that someone close to you has. Here's some helpful advice to better navigate these challenging times.

  • Reflect On:

    How does your breakup make you feel? Whether it's sad, angry, lonely or a combination of them all what mental shifts can you make to help you move on in a healthy way?

Romantic relationships are undoubtedly one of the most interesting facets to life.

When they’re going well, they have the potential to uplift us to levels of contentment we once thought to never be possible. This is especially true at the beginning of a new relationship, when both partners find themselves in what many label as the “honeymoon stage,” where neither can seemingly do wrong in the eyes of the other.

However, when a romantic relationship is either going poorly or is non-existent in our life, we can quite easily find ourselves locked into states of anger and/or sadness because of it. Seeing as though you’ve been “click-baited” into reading this article, I’m willing to bet that the second scenario currently applies to either you or someone close to you.

As someone who has been through my fair share of breakups over the years–a number that easily doubles in size if I also count the number of friends and family members I’ve helped navigate through theirs–here’s my take on what we can all do to process the end of a relationship in a healthier, faster way.

(Disclaimer: Of course there are always extremes and extraneous factors that complicate this process in some instances, but this advice is designed to tackle solely the mental and emotional sides of things for those who know they can move on but are struggling to do so.)

If You Feel Sad Because You Still Love Them

If you find yourself feeling this way, chances are that you were either the recipient of an unexpected breakup or a circumstance forced you to end something you previously felt secure in. Regardless of what triggers you into feeling this way, the strongest step to overcoming it is to assess the quality of the thoughts you’re having about your former relationship.

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For you to be feeling this way, you’re likely looking back on the relationship with rose-colored glasses.

A great illustration of what I mean by this can be found in the movie 500 Days of Summer [SPOILER ALERT] when the main character Tom–played by Joseph Gordon-Levitt–finds himself reeling after being broken up with. It isn’t until his younger sister Rachel–played by Chloë Grace Moretz–unexpectedly reminds him of not only many of the not so shiny moments of the relationship, but also shows him a different perspective where the couple’s doom could be more easily understood.

That’s not to say that you and your ex didn’t share a lot of wonderful things together, it’s just that solely focusing on those moments rather than seeing the bigger picture is likely keeping you trapped in love.

If You Feel Angry Because They Ruined Everything

If you find yourself feeling this way, chances are that in your mind the other half to this now failed partnership is largely to blame. And while that may be true, dwelling on that fact isn’t doing you any favors, nor is it going to change the past.

Rather than continuing to be angry at them for what they did or failed to do, mentally shift yourself to focus on what you no longer have to deal with. If necessary, even write it down. If they were capable of triggering a breakup, chances are they have a number of qualities and behaviours that you now won’t have to deal with.

If You Feel Alone Because You Miss Having Someone

Take whatever time you need to process what’s happened, but when you find yourself dwelling, fill the voids that your relationship used to fill with the things that YOU genuinely love.

All relationships, no matter how perfectly compatible you and your partner’s interests were, require some give and take. With that being the case, chances are that there is a passion or two or twenty you either put in the rear view mirror or barely engaged with while in your relationship.

Instead of staying in and sulking while binge watching a rom-com that perpetuates a relationship ideal we all know isn’t really possible, push yourself to do what you know you love to do deep down. It may feel incredibly uncomfortable at first, but the more you get yourself back into it, the quicker your love for that activity is likely to take over and help you move on.

If You Feel Justified Because Your Friends Say You Should

Realize that despite their best intentions, you’ve likely turned to the wrong friends for support at this stage. While your dramatic and reactive friends can be incredibly helpful upon first impact of the breakup happening, there naturally comes a point where you instead need to turn to those that you know are going to give you the tough love and honesty you require to move on.


For more brutally honest personal development content designed for those who actually want to change be sure to subscribe to my YouTube Channel and to follow me on Instagram. And to receive my free eBook on 5 Simple Daily Hacks For A Genuinely Happier Life click HERE.

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CETV

 

The all-new CETV brings together the leading voices in the truth and consciousness realm to a single platform for the first time ever. 

Thanks, you're keeping conscious media alive.