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This Woman Was Raped & Forgave Him, So They Did A Ted Talk Together

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94% of all sexual assault cases go unreported and 1 in 4 North American women will be sexually assaulted in their lifetime (source). These statistics sadly aren’t much of a shock when you consider how much the media and society sexualize women. Given the enormity of the stigma surrounding rape culture, do you really blame survivors or their rapists for not wanting to come forward?

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Society often pities rape survivors, deeming them as damaged or even blaming them for what happened. Women are told their skirts were too high or that they must have somehow “been asking for it.” In some situations, survivors could even be killed for reporting their perpetrators. It’s rare for rapists to own up to their crimes as well because they’re ostracized and dehumanized, as society has so little compassion for them even though they arguably need it most.

Survivor Thordis Elva and her rapist Tom Stranger are challenging that stigma together by discussing both sides of the story: from the rapist’s and the survivor’s perspectives. Although they both took part in the same story, they had opposing experiences, which in turn affected their lives very differently. In hopes of inspiring other rape victims and rapists to face their inner struggles, they gave a Ted Talk together.

Why This Victim Chose to Forgive Her Rapist

If you’ve been raped, it can be easy (and completely understandable) to place the blame on yourself, be embarrassed, angry, or ashamed, suppress your emotions, or misplace your despair on others, or even worse, on yourself.

However, as Thordis so kindly points out, “the only thing that could’ve stopped me from being raped that night is the man who raped me.” At the end of the day, you cannot control another person’s actions. Yes, you have the power to manifest and create your own reality, but so does everyone else. There’s no point in over-analyzing or regretting your actions because the victim’s actions are ultimately never the cause of rape.

As Tom says, “Far too often the responsibility is attributed to female survivors of sexual violence and not the males who enact it. Far too often the denial and running leaves all parties at a great distance from the truth.”

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Part of the issue with rape culture is the victimization of sexual assault survivors and the immense amount of judgement placed on the perpetrators. This prevents both parties from feeling comfortable in expressing their emotions or sharing their experiences with others.

Yes, the rapist is responsible for his or her actions and the blame should never be placed on the victim, but just because the rapist committed a violent act doesn’t make him or her a bad person. Souls that succumb to violence are simply lost, so instead of judging them for their actions we need to help them see their actions for what they truly are.

Plus, by referring to survivors as victims, we further perpetuate the idea that rape survivors are somehow less than those who haven’t suffered similar traumas. This also encourages survivors to live in “victim consciousness,” the state whereby we continuously think “poor me” and ask ourselves, “Why me?”

As Thordis explains, “Labels are a way to organize concepts, but they can also be dehumanizing in their connotations. Once someone’s been deemed a victim, it’s that much easier to file them away as someone damaged, dishonoured, less than. Likewise, when someone’s been deemed a rapist it’s that much easier to call them a monster, inhuman.”

Since we encourage survivors to accept their role as the “victim” of sexual assault, this can cause survivors to place blame and anger on their attackers. It’s natural to want to blame someone, even hate someone, when they hurt you, and it’s important to feel these emotions rather than suppress them. However, when you spend a lot of your energy thinking negatively about someone else, you are hurting no one but yourself.

As Buddha said, “You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger.” Forgiveness is one of the best ways to overcome anger, as it allows you to find the light within darkness. Even if you don’t think your rapist deserves your forgiveness, recognize that you deserve it.

Thordis found forgiveness through contacting her rapist, Tom. She wrote him a letter outlining her feelings and terrifying experiences that night, which proved to be very therapeutic for her. To her surprise, Tom responded explaining that he too had been trapped in a “silent prison,” just as she had. He hadn’t spoken to anyone about the events that occurred that night, and neither had she.

Thordis, from Iceland, and Tom, from Australia, decided to meet partway in Capetown, South Africa, to discuss what had happened in person. They found solace in talking through the horrific events that transpired that night, and ended up extending compassion to one another.

I think it’s easier for many people to relate to Thordis’ pain, as she was the one who was raped. We often hear the story from the survivor’s perspective, so it’s easier, in a sense, to paint that type of image in our heads. However, the fact of the matter is, 1 in 16 men are rapists, so odds are that you’ve met someone or are even friends or related to someone who’s a rapist.

If you found out your father or your lover was a rapist, would you still consider them the same person? Does one single act have the potential to define our entire self? If someone commits an act of violence, I don’t think this reflects their inner Self, but rather is a product of societal or behavioural issues. This is why I think Tom’s message is so crucial for us to reflect upon.

Tom was always too ashamed of what he’d done to face it. He justified his actions by suppressing his true feelings, which in turn forced him to continuously feel like he needed to convince himself that he was a good person.

When he was finally ready to face his actions and take responsibility for what he’d done, he referred to it as a “paradox of ownership,” saying: “I thought I’d buckle under the weight of responsibility and I thought my certificate of humanity would be burned. Instead, I was offered to really own what I did and found that it didn’t possess the entirety of who I am. Put simply, something you’ve done doesn’t have to constitute the sum of who you are.”

Have you ever made a mistake that forced you to really question your humanity? We want to believe that everything we should do is “right,” which is why labelling our actions as “right” or “wrong” can lead to suffering. However, our humanity isn’t defined only by that which we perceive as being “right.” Everything we do is human; our mistakes don’t dehumanize us, they’re part of what makes us human in the first place.

I’m not suggesting that every “immoral” act can be justified by simply stating, “I’m only human.” To be honest, I think that statement is used far too often to bypass our emotions and avoid dealing with our problems. However, if you do something that you consider “wrong,” I don’t think that makes you any less human.

As Thordis explains, “But how will we understand what it is in human societies that produces violence if we refuse to recognize the humanity of those who commit it?”

You can watch the full Ted Talk below:

Final Thoughts

Thordis’ and Tom’s story serves as a beautiful reminder that we are all capable of forgiveness. Even in our darkest moments where our sorrows feel as though they will define us forever, we can still find hope.

As souls, we come here to gain experience. However, the human experience is one that exists within a dualistic world, so we are bound to experience some darkness. Some of our darker experiences our souls actually want to go through (which may seem unimaginable now) so we can develop insight and learn more about ourselves.

In theory, prior to this lifetime, your soul could have asked another soul to commit a “wrongdoing” to you here on Earth so you could learn from it. Every experience is ultimately a learning opportunity, and some may have been predetermined by your soul contracts. Many of your perceivably darker moments in life aren’t being done “to you,” but rather “for you.” Everything serves you.

Even though these violent acts are indeed a part of humanity, it’s important to note that they don’t reflect our true selvesWe are not only the outer human shells that are governed by emotions; we are the souls that inhabit them as well.

 

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Alternative News

Why I Haven’t Paid Much Attention To “Q Anon”

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We are living in some very interesting times. Amidst all of the mass brainwashing we’ve received from establishment mouthpieces (mainstream media), the birth of alternative media brought to light information that simply wasn’t being presented by the mainstream media. Prior to the mass popularity that alternative media garnered, global media was completely owned by a handful of corporations. It still remains a vital tool for this small group of powerful people to completely control the perception of millions of people across the world.

The owners of these outlets did not like how their viewers were wandering off to alternative media, so they’ve used their power to create massive amounts of censorship, but the truth can’t really be stopped. This is why we’ve seen the persecution of Wikileaks, for example, and the demonization of alternative media outlets simply because their beliefs don’t fit the accepted framework of knowledge. Alternative media outlets have been demonetized and censored, and multiple award-winning mainstream media journalists have called out mainstream media and how these networks are slaves to their masters–their masters being big corporations, governments, and intelligence agencies.

Truth doesn’t come from mainstream media, so it’s no mystery why millions have flocked to other sources of information that provide evidence instead of a news anchor simply talking, since these networks do nothing but push propaganda and put out false information.

Our world is and has been experiencing a shift in consciousness for a very long time, and a big reason the global elite started to deem certain information and credible sources as ‘fake news’ and subject them to extreme amounts of censorship was simply due to the fact that this type of information is extremely threatening to several corporate, political and elitists agendas, so much so that freedom of information and speech continues to be censored.

In the midst of all this, along came “Q Anon.” For reasons I am completely unaware of, I never took an interest in Q Anon, and still haven’t. Perhaps it was the predictions being made that didn’t come to light, although many did, or perhaps it’s the fact that it could be anyone speaking. Nevertheless, I simply don’t know why I never took an interest.

The thought crossed my mind that collective consciousness has shifted so much, and so many people have awakened to so many different things, that the only way to capture and deceive this segment of people, who represent the majority in my opinion, would be to develop a character like Q. I don’t really believe this, it was just a thought that crossed my mind.

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The thought also crossed my mind that Q could be legit, given the fact that they’ve put out information and predictions that have come to light. Q has a good track record for that and appears to be a team of people who are in or have access to the “inside.” In this sense, Q seems very legit at times.

Furthermore, Q could represent Donald Trump and another faction of the ‘Deep State.’ I believe there are governments within governments, and they are constantly fighting for power, but always remain at the top. This is evident by the fact that all presidents and politicians always followed the will of their masters, they’ve all had ties and close relationships with corporations and the elite and made policies that benefited certain corporate interests and elitist agendas.

What turns me away from Q is its religious-like following. What Q preaches is never questioned by them, and a lot of information and claims are put out there simply based on nothing. Q is not really needed, there are more than enough whistleblowers, documentation, etc. to really seek out the truth and present it in a credible way that will reach the masses.

That being said, Q has no doubt been an awakening trigger forcing and encouraging people to think for themselves, connect the dots, and do their own research.

Trump is also not questioned by many and is seen as a saviour in some cases. People are giving away their own critical thinking, they’re giving away their own brain to another entity without questioning it. Regardless of whether or not Q is legit, or represents another side of the ‘deep state’ or not, this is dangerous.

There have also been some shady claims, just as there have been some legit claims made by Q. One of them was when Q claimed the arrest of Julian Assange was to free him from his poor conditions, and that we should simply just “trust the plan.” This was far from the truth, and this is one of multiple examples that raised red flags about Q in my mind. At the same time, there are many things Q has put out that have been credible and that suggest Q is part of or has deep connections to the inside.

I don’t think that this is a larper… This is way beyond, this is someone who is, I don’t think it’s possible to say the things that Q has been saying without being a true insider. So it’s someone that is real, it’s someone that truly believes that Trump is working against the deep state for the good of the American people, that’s their perspective. The real question is how accurate are they, and I don’t really have an answer to that. – Richard Dolan (source)

When it comes to Trump, it’s quite clear and easy to see, in my opinion, that he represented a disturbance to some very powerful elite that use people like Hillary Clinton to represent them. Trump represented, and still does in many ways, an ‘outsider.’ Looking at politics with no opinion or bias and without a “republican” or “democrat” point of view, it’s easy to see how, during Trump’s campaign, the powerful elite did everything possible to ensure a victory for Clinton. This included not only swaying the Democratic party (which previously played dirty pool against Bernie Sanders), but the entire mainstream media machine, the financial community, the EU, and even the Republican party itself.

Since Trump’s campaign, we have been told that Trump is a racist, sexist, xenophobe, liar, cheat, and narcissist. It’s reminiscent of the concerted media attack against Brazil’s Dilma Rousseff, which culminated earlier in 2016 in her impeachment and removal from power. It’s important to understand why Trump is demonized, and that’s because he is a disruptor, and his disruption falls squarely against the two key pillars of the American ruling elite’s ideology: neoliberalism and neoconservatism.

During Trump’s campaign, he was quite vocal about pharmaceutical corruption, the US government funding terrorist organizations, vaccine safety, and he even called out Bill Clinton and his relationship to Jeffrey Epstein. Now, in some instances, he seems to have changed his views on a few matters, which goes to show that he could have been compromised by the deep state, or the other side of the deep state, if you will.

“So a person is elected, he comes with his ideas. Then people with briefcases come to visit him, well dressed, in dark suits, kind of like mine. Except instead of a red tie it’s black or navy. And then they explain what to do, and the whole rhetoric changes, you see? This happens from one administration to the next.”  – Vladimir Putin, providing one of many examples of politicians around the world and within the US speaking up about this hidden power that controls the presidency. (source)

I’d like to leave you with this thought-provoking quote from Catherine Austin Fitts, former Commissioner of the United States Department of Housing and Urban Development, who recently said:

“In the Red Button Problem, everybody wants their check and they want to pretend that they are good. So it’s very important that politicians come up with this story of ‘good’. The story of ‘I’m good,’ doesn’t have to make sense, but it has to be good enough so that I can just take my check and feel good and not have to do anything. It’s a way of being free to stay on my couch and do the things that I love instead of being bothered with the responsibility of being a citizen.”

So Q is the new story of, ‘I am good,’ because, ‘I can just trust the plan, and these covert operators are going to get their thing done.’ So I’ve been nice because I know some very intelligent, capable people who buy this whole thing hook, line, and sinker. It has been really frustrating for you and me. I took FASAB 56 to these Q believers, and they said, ‘You need to trust the plan.'”

The Takeaway

It appears that people are becoming too engaged with the Q narrative that it is blinding them from the truth of what Q is actually representing. Instead of viewing Q as right or wrong, what steps does it represent in our awakening process? Is the narrative truly creating a world where humanity thrives? Or is it perhaps only taking us a step forward, if at all?

We can’t let Q do all thinking, we must continue to do what got is here in the first place, that’s think for ourselves. It’s ok to peak and take a look at Q, but to hang on to and live and die by everything Q says, and to constantly push the idea that whatever Q says is correct is a little troublesome to me.

Related CE Article: Is The Q Narrative Providing False Hope? Catherine Austin Fitts Weights In

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We've launched a funding campaign to fuel our efforts on this matter as we are confident we can make a difference and have a strong plan to get it done.

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Alternative News

Couple Builds A Stunning Tiny Home & Escapes City Life (Video)

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In Brief

  • The Facts:

    One of the recent episodes on "Living Big In A Tiny House" featured a former full time writer here at Collective Evolution, Jeff Roberts, and his partner Derek. What they've built is amazing and will no doubt inspire many to do the same.

  • Reflect On:

    The tiny home trend has and is increasing in popularity, why do you think people are finding that it increases their quality of life?

Tiny Homes have been a growing trend for a number of years for multiple reasons. It’s definitely more affordable to buy or to build a tiny home compared to living in a modern day home. It’s also much more environmentally friendly, and perhaps the best part is that it’s mobile. It must really make those who live in one realize that a full sized home and all of the troubles that can come with it are unnecessary, and that living in a tiny home doesn’t decrease the enjoyment of your home and instead, probably increases it. Perhaps the best part about living in a tiny home is that they are mobile, you are not ‘stuck’ in one spot and can relocate with low cost and ease when ever you choose to do so compared to a regular home and going through the process of finding a new one.

Obviously, there are many examples of tiny homes floating around out there, but the story about the one below is special because one of the gentleman you see in the video below, Jeff Roberts, is a former full time writer here at Collective Evolution and a friend, he still contributes every now and then with regards to providing us with content.

If you’re interested, you can read his articles here.

For Jeff and his partner Derek, the tiny house build started out as a fun design project with the idea of parking the house in the driveway of their Victoria, BC home and renting it out as an Air BnB. Eventually, they fell in love with it and decided to move in and rent out their larger home instead. The feature was done by “Living Big In A Tiny House.” You can access their Youtube channel here to see some more examples of people living in tiny homes

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You Can Help Stop The 5G Infrastructure

We plan to investigate the telecom industry, it’s ties to politics, and expose its efforts to push 5G while ignoring the dangers and without proper safety testing, but we can't do it without your support.

We've launched a funding campaign to fuel our efforts on this matter as we are confident we can make a difference and have a strong plan to get it done.

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Alternative News

Everything You Need To Know About 5G & The Solutions To Stop It – Free Summit

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In Brief

  • The Facts:

    The 5G Crisis: Awareness & Accountability Summit kicks off soon and will bring together the top experts in the space who can help make sense of the 5G issue and bring together solutions to stop it.

  • Reflect On:

    Should we really be unveiling a technology that is not safety tested? Should we listen to the thousands of scientists showing concern? Sign up to this summit so you don't miss the latest in what's unfolding with 5G.

We get more emails and questions from people seeking information and solutions to 5G than we do anything else, and it totally makes sense because this is a global health crisis that truly affects us all.

Coming up soon is the 5G Crisis: Awareness & Accountability SummitIt’s an online summit with a ton of incredible speakers that will inform you on the latest information regarding 5G, what’s going on and the solutions that are coming to the table.

I did an interview for this summit and it gave me an opportunity to talk about what I feel is going on with 5G and the consciousness implications of it…

I also talked about:

  • Analysis of Trump, Q Anon, and other “narrative” storylines in pushing 5G
  • How to bring people closer together
  • Empowering the conscious meta-shift that’s underway

As always, the approach I took to my interview was exploring the world events taking place and understanding the metaphysics of it as it’s within the metaphysics that we understand how to create the change and not move forward in fear.

–>> Save your spot and learn more about the dangers of 5G wireless when you attend this free, online event.

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If you’re not all that aware of why people are concerned about 5G it boils down to a few key facts. The telecom industry HAS NOT shown 5G to be safe for your health or privacy — yet THOUSANDS of peer-reviewed, independent studies show otherwise — and they’re building it anyway.

Hundreds of scientists from 40 different countries have reached out to the United Nations and the FCC, asking them to consider health risks and environmental issues before rapidly deploying 5G — because these researchers have studies that show adverse biological and health effects from EMF sources.

5G uses a higher frequency in its transmission and therefore travels shorter distances than our current wireless signals, this means the frequency has to be A LOT more powerful than what we are used to.

To make up for the short distance travel capability, millions more signal transmitters need to be installed around cities and neighbourhoods to get coverage. Each tower will emit radiation at levels known to cause cancer, sterility, DNA damage and other harm… especially to our children, who are most at risk.

It may be concerning, and that’s because it is a really bad idea… but we can stop it…

Join us at the 5G Crisis summit to discover:

● My awesome interview! 😉
● 5G defined: research, facts and awareness
● Science about the dangers of 5G and EMF radiation
● Sources of wireless radiation and “dirty electricity” in your home
● Link between 5G, Al and global surveillance
● How groups and individuals are successfully opposing 5G
● Simple, empowering actions you can take, here and now
● Individual solutions and safer, revolutionary technologies
● And more!

My two good friends, whom I’ve been speaking with about 5G for months now, Josh del Sol and Sayer Ji are the hosts for this event.

If you’re hungry for cutting-edge information with life-saving consequences, and want to be part of a movement dedicated to empowering ourselves and humanity, join us for this event!

—>>I’ll see you online at The 5G Crisis Summit when you register today!

You Can Help Stop The 5G Infrastructure

We plan to investigate the telecom industry, it’s ties to politics, and expose its efforts to push 5G while ignoring the dangers and without proper safety testing, but we can't do it without your support.

We've launched a funding campaign to fuel our efforts on this matter as we are confident we can make a difference and have a strong plan to get it done.

Check out our plan and join our campaign here.

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