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Admitting Your Grievances Against Your Partner: Your Best Hope For Healing Your Relationship

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In Brief

  • The Facts:

    Grievances hidden in your mind against your partner's habits and behaviors can impact your happiness and damage your relationship.

  • Reflect On:

    Is it possible to see that there is nothing truly 'wrong' with anything your partner does? What do you think your experience in your relationship would be like if you saw it that way?

Before you begin...

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Take a moment and breathe. Place your hand over your chest area, near your heart. Breathe slowly into the area for about a minute, focusing on a sense of ease entering your mind and body. Click here to learn why we suggest this.

One of the great challenges of long-term relationships is how we deal with things we simply don’t like about our partner. In the early courtship days those were the things that we could overlook amidst the bliss of a budding romance. But as time goes on and the early excitement slowly wears off, we are confronted with those recurring habits and behaviors of our partner that cause us anything from minor irritation to explosive anger.

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If you are clear that you are not completely happy with how you are experiencing your relationship, and you are open to any and all possibilities that have the potential to bring back greater intimacy, vitality and connectedness, it’s important to understand that all the power you need is within you. And I will explain that to you right here.

--> Our latest podcast episode: Were humans created by extraterrestrials? Joe sits down with Bruce Fenton, multidisciplinary researcher and author to explore the fascinating evidence behind this question. Click here to listen!

Self-Responsibility

The first key tenet here is accepting the notion that you are 100% responsible for your experience in your relationship. That can be a very difficult concept for people to accept, since one of the reasons many are in a relationship is to be with someone who will ‘make them happy.’ Yet, paradoxically, if you are truly going to be happy in a relationship, especially one that you hope will last, you need to stop believing that the other person has a responsibility to do things that will make you happy. Not only does this give your power away, but it sets you up to be able to blame your partner if they are not doing the things you ‘need’ them to do to make you happy. And herein lie your grievances. And a lot of your unhappiness.

Grievances

A grievance is not just something we don’t like about what our partner says or does; it’s something we hold in our minds as ‘wrong’, often subconsciously. When our partner does something that we don’t like, we may just bite our lip and try to ignore it. However, it is important that we don’t just bury our feelings about it–we need to admit to those feelings and then we need to forgive them for having done that thing.

But here’s where it gets subtle. Even if you forgive your partner in one particular instance, if you still hold what they did as bad and wrong, you will continue to hold a grievance about that kind of behavior. If your forgiveness is predicated on the belief that your partner should never do it again, then you are setting yourself up for disappointment, blame, even rage. Beyond your decision to forgive any particular action or behavior on the part of your partner, you have to be willing to let go of your judgment that said behavior is wrong.

True Acceptance

If you want to free yourself from the misery of blame and judgment, and in the process free your relationship from suppressed anger from the past, then you will endeavor to get over your pride and truly accept your partner as they are, and accept the things they do. True acceptance means that your underlying belief is that their behavior is not wrong–it just ‘is’, like a rainy day or the color blue. And there is no need to get them to change that behavior.

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Now–stay with me here–this is not to say that you need to condone behavior that you feel is clearly harmful to you. What you consider ‘harmful’ is really up to you, but verbal and certainly physical abuse falls into this category. What is imperative in this case, if you do not condone certain behavior, is to be fully willing to leave the relationship if that behavior continues. So don’t condone what is not acceptable to you, and fully accept the rest.

Note that tolerance is not full acceptance. Tolerance plays out in behaviors that you often don’t bother to comment about, but inside you find them annoying, frustrating, and essentially wrong. If you ever find yourself saying ‘Why do you always–?’ then you are dealing with a grievance based on past behaviors that you haven’t truly accepted although you may have tolerated. The frustration behind your complaints about your partner’s habitual behavior will be a good clue about how deep your grievance is in that matter. And it’s important to recognize that it is your grievance, not your partner’s behavior, that is the true source of your frustration. This is the way of thinking of people who are self-responsible.

If you are truly willing to examine your grievances, with a clear intention of letting go of them, self-honesty and awareness are the key. If you happen to have a partner who is of the same mind, and you are ready to work together in bringing back freshness and intimacy to your relationship that has been stolen away by grievances, here is something you can do.

Working Together On Your Grievances

1) Make a list of ALL the things that bother you about your partner, all the things that you feel have caused you pain in the past, all the things that you put up with but you don’t like, are annoyed with, angry about, even things that seem minor to you. Take your time, even if it takes a few days, and make a serious, comprehensive list, scouring your mind for all signs of resentment, bitterness, and disappointment. And of course, have your partner do the same thing.

2) Set some significant time aside to sit privately with your partner, at least two hours, even if it doesn’t end up taking that long. Let your partner list all their grievances they have against you; allow them to explain in as much detail as they want, and allow them to experience any emotions associated with those grievances. Listen carefully and don’t interrupt. When the person is finished, tell them “I heard you.” Then switch roles.

3) Now you can have a discussion on it. But that discussion will only be fruitful if you and your partner both have the desire to let go of your grievances against each other. You must be prepared to forgive each other for each grievance you have against them, and furthermore, let go of the judgment that any particular habit or behavior is wrong. In other words, you have to demonstrate that you are willing to love what you don’t like about your partner.

In this type of conversation, you are likely to find yourself much more inclined to listen to your partner’s grievances against you rather than resisting them, and you may even feel the desire to commit to your partner that you plan to stop doing some of those things or at least be more aware of them. This can be a nice byproduct of the conversation, just remember not to go into the conversation with the intention of getting your partner to change the behaviors you have grievances about.

Working By Yourself On Your Grievances

Now, in many cases, you may not have a partner who is willing or ready to go through the exercise described above. No matter. In realizing that you are 100% responsible for your experience in your relationship, you realize that letting go of grievances is really an internal process, even when you work on it together. And you know that in letting go of your judgments about what’s ‘wrong’ with your partner, you will get out of the habit of complaining and blaming your partner, and liberate yourself from the anger and frustration attached to some of your partner’s habits.

You may work on it in a formal way, making a full list of your grievances, and then reading them over, one by one, making an effort first to forgive your partner’s past behaviors, understanding they are human like you, accepting that they were doing the best they could at the time. And then, remind yourself that there is nothing wrong about this behavior, it just ‘is’, and you will endeavor to meet it with compassion the next time it happens.

A less formal way to practice is to notice your grievances as they arise, and try to step back from the judgments behind them after you notice a buildup of anger or resentment towards your partner for habitual behaviors you may have already told them you don’t like. At first, this will often happen only after you have complained (i.e. ‘Why do you always leave the lights on?’), but reminding yourself that you no longer hold this behavior to be ‘wrong’ will help dissipate your negative feelings and move you back into harmony with your partner. Eventually, you will remember that you don’t believe these behaviors are wrong even before you utter a word of complaint, and will experience more flow and peace in your relationship in general.

Now it must be said, that even if you let go of all your grievances against your partner, you may find yourself feeling unhappy, unsatisfied, or unfulfilled in the relationship. In this case, it may become clear to you that it is time to end the relationship. Having let go of your grievances, you are able to make a clear choice, not based on a buildup of anger and frustration that has become intolerable, but based on a deeply grounded perception of your relationship that tells you whether or not you want this partner to continue to be a part of your journey.

The Takeaway

Having grievances about some of your partner’s habitual behaviors is ultimately a prison of your own mind, and can be detrimental to your personal happiness and damaging to your relationship. If you are able to take the big leap–and indeed your ego will resist this every step of the way–to fully let go of the perceived ‘wrongness’ of any and all of your partner’s habits and behaviors, you are paving the way to greater inner joy, as well as providing the relationship with its best opportunity not only to survive but to thrive.

Dive Deeper

These days, it’s not just knowing information and facts that will create change, it’s changing ourselves, how we go about communicating, and re-assessing the underlying stories, ideas and beliefs that form our world. We have to practice these things if we truly want to change. At Collective Evolution and CETV, this is a big part of our mission.

Amongst 100's of hours of exclusive content, we have recently completed two short courses to help you become an effective changemaker, one called Profound Realization and the other called How To Do An Effective Media Detox.

Join CETV, engage with these courses and more here!

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Alternative News

Nina Kulagina: A Real Psychokinetic Documented By The U.S. Defense Intelligence Agency

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CE Staff Writer 8 minute read

In Brief

  • The Facts:

    A declassified U.S. DIA report from 1972 provides a plethora of information from the then Soviet Union regarding studies and people with "paranormal" abilities. One of them is Nina Kulagina, who could use her mind to interact with matter.

  • Reflect On:

    New discoveries have always been severely ridiculed. It wasn't long ago when scientific discoveries that challenged the accepted framework of reality were ridiculed and disregarded. Have we changed much today?

Before you begin...

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Take a moment and breathe. Place your hand over your chest area, near your heart. Breathe slowly into the area for about a minute, focusing on a sense of ease entering your mind and body. Click here to learn why we suggest this.

Introduction: It’s quite odd that “paranormal” abilities are, and have been for decades, studied and confirmed at the highest levels of government or what some would consider at levels beyond the government in black budget Special Access Programs, yet brushed off as conspiracy theories, ridiculed, and remain virtually unacknowledged within mainstream academica.  These black budget programs are exempt from standard reporting requirements in the to congress in the United States, as outlined by a 1997 U.S. senate report, and based on my research there are also unacknowledged Special Access Programs that have no oversight at all from the government.

Unfortunately they’ve been studied and used for military and intelligence collection purposes, and have always remained “classified” for “national security” reasons. Developments and discoveries within this black budget world never seem to be brought to light or used for the benefit of humanity. In fact, the United States has a history of government agencies existing in secret for years. The National Security Agency (NSA) was founded in 1952, its existence was hidden until the mid 1960’s. Even more secretive is the National Reconnaissance Office, which was founded in 1960 but remained completely secret for 30 years. Our world today is drenched in secrecy.

From the declassified literature alone, there are many examples documenting people with gifted abilities able to do some extraordinary things. This declassified CIA document and this Air Force teleportation study outlines children with the ability to teleport objects in closed containers from one location to another. The containers were never touched or opened, showing that these children could transport the object through the sealed containers. These experiments were done under double-blind controlled conditions.

Another example documents the “paranormal writing” ability of a little girl, and a woman who is able to gather information about a person from simply holding and touching an object that is/was affiliated with the person in question. Then there is the remote viewing program which yielded significant and repeatable results, according to a paper published in the Journal of Scientific Exploration after the program was declassified. Remote viewing is the ability to describe a remote geographical from another location, regardless of distance and time.

This article looks into a woman by the name of Nina Kulagina. I use “real” in the title because the Defense Intelligence Agency report referenced below refers to her as an “outstanding PK (psychokinesis) psychic.”

What Happened: Nina Kulagina was a citizen of the former Soviet Union. She apparently demonstrated psychokinetic influence on physical objects, and caused quite a stir at the time. In 1968 western researchers attending a conference were shown a video of her in action. There are a number of documents one can find within the Central Intelligence Agency’s (CIA) electronic reading room that document her abilities and show a high level of interest in them. According to the Russians, Kulagina had been studied by forty prominent scientists, including two Nobel Laureates.

Studies of the electrical fields around her body as well as the electrical potentials in her brain, and more, were conducted by well-known physiologist Dr. Genady Sergeyev, who was working in a Leningrad military laboratory. Exceptionally strong voltages and other unusual effects were observed.

A declassified Defense Intelligence Agency document (page 35) from the United States, written by John D. Lamothe, Captain, Medical Service Corps, reads as follows:

Sergeyev has conducted several years of intensive lab research on the outstanding PK psychic in Leningrad, Nina Kulagina…Sergeyev heightened biological luminescence radiating from Kulagina’s eyes during the apparent movement of objects by pk. Sergeyev postulates that the “bio-plasma” of the human body must interact with the environment to produce pk. Sergeyev emphasizes when target objects are placed in a vacuum, Kuligina is unable to move them. Barcus in the United States reports some unusual occurrences during psychic photography especially of the eyes.

Reportedly, Kuligina has caused the movement of a wide range of non-magnetic objects: (under strict scientific control) of crystal bowls, clock pendulums, bread, matches, etc.  In one test, a raw egg was placed in a salt solution inside a sealed aquarium six feet away from her. Researchers report she was able to use PK to separate the yolk from the white of the egg. Observations by Western scientists of Mrs. Kulagina’s PK ability has been reported with verification of her authentic ability. These same Western scientists have reported that as of February 1971, they have not been able to visit or observe Mrs. Kulagina. A veil of secrecy has been placed on Sergeyev and Mrs. Kulagina for unknown reasons.

A report from 1975 when Lamothe was a Major reads as follows:

Soviet research with Kulagina…indicates that energy interchanges, or transfer between mechanisms, may be possible between gifted psychics with inanimate objects. There is evidence that Soviet research with these women (Kuligina is not the only one) also involves attempts to influence animate biological systems. In 1972, LaMothe reported that Kulagina had the capability for stopping and starting the beat of an excised, living, frog heart. If true, it supports the contention that Czech and Soviet claims for “beneficial” applications of biological energy transfer might be imposed on humans. Such dramatic effects illustrate some of the dangerous potential of controlled biological energy transfer.

According to researcher Dr. Jeffrey Mishole, who did his doctorate in Parapsychology,

There is a large gradient between the electrical characteristics in the forward part of Mikhailova’s (Kuligina) brain versus the back part of the brain (fifty to one), whereas in the average person the gradient is four to one.  The usual force field around Mikhailova’s body is ten times weaker than the magnetic field of the earth.

During PK, her pulse rises to 240 per minute.  There is activation of deeper levels of the occipital lobe and reticular formation.  This enhances polarization in the brain between front and back, says Sergeyev.  When the gradient between front and back of the brain reaches a certain level, and there is most intense activity in the occipital lobe, radiation of electrostatic and electromagnetic fields are detected by the force field detectors four feet from the body….Heartbeat, brain waves, and force field fluctuations are in ratio.  The fields around the PK medium are stronger further away than close to the head.  Mikhailova appears to focus these force field waves in a specific area.

In the 1975 report from Lamothe mentioned above, he also mentions that Kulagina experiences dizziness, elevated heart rate, anxiety and sometimes felt ill while performing in front of scientists and military personnell. Lamothe mentions that she had a much easier time and didn’t experience these symptoms and feelings of discomfort, which also affected her ability, when demonstrating her abilities in front of friends, or those who were already open to this type of phenomenon.

There are multiple videos of Kuligina that can be found on YouTube, and various articles attempting to, as with all other “psychics” who have in some way gone public or have been brought into the limelight of the public by others, debunk her and label her is a fraud. This is why I refer to official documentation published and archived by intelligence agencies, because it’s a fact that they took the matter quite seriously and those that claim to debunk Kuligina never really provide any sources. Keep in mind that she is one of many examples. The fact of the matter is that people with these types of abilities, and the idea that these abilities may be real and lay dormant within all of us simply threatens the beliefs and world paradigm of many people. This doesn’t mean that there aren’t frauds out there by the way, but it seems that everybody in this category seems to be listed as one.

Concluding Comments: Humanity still seems to have a difficult time accepting or even looking into concepts and phenomena that may not fit the frame. When it comes to topics like parapsychology, it can be especially difficult due to the fact that it’s been completely ridiculed, labelled as a hoax and deemed a “conspiracy theory” for many decades. This massie ridicule campaign has really closed the collective mind when it comes to even entertaining this type of thing.

That being said, we here at Collective Evolution continue to cover such phenomenon because it’s one of many that is and does have the potential to greatly expand human consciousness and the way we perceive our world. There is still so much to discover about the nature of reality. This is why I believe Nikola Tesla said that “The day science begins to study non-physical phenomena, it will make more progress in one decade than in all the previous centuries of its existence. ((Saad & Medeiros, 2015) I believe non-material science represents the next scientific revolution.

As I’ve said many times before, it’s not new discoveries, developments and technological advancements that will change the world, it’s the consciousness behind these factors that determines which way as a collective we move. Do we use our discoveries and advancements for the betterment of humanity and in service to others? Or do we use them for control, profit, greed, to build weapons and to feed the ego? Real change comes from within. We cannot change and transform the human experience without an inner transformation, and I believe humanity is currently going through that process.

Dive Deeper

These days, it’s not just knowing information and facts that will create change, it’s changing ourselves, how we go about communicating, and re-assessing the underlying stories, ideas and beliefs that form our world. We have to practice these things if we truly want to change. At Collective Evolution and CETV, this is a big part of our mission.

Amongst 100's of hours of exclusive content, we have recently completed two short courses to help you become an effective changemaker, one called Profound Realization and the other called How To Do An Effective Media Detox.

Join CETV, engage with these courses and more here!

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Consciousness

Scientists Think They Have Found A Portal To The 5th Dimension

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CE Staff Writer 4 minute read

In Brief

  • The Facts:

    A new study claims to have found an explanation for dark matter, but relies on the discovery of a particle which leads to another dimension.

  • Reflect On:

    How do discoveries shift our understanding of reality and perhaps, who we are? Can a journey down the rabbit hole of non-material science cause understanding of the nature of human consciousness that can shift how we live our lives?

Before you begin...

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Take a moment and breathe. Place your hand over your chest area, near your heart. Breathe slowly into the area for about a minute, focusing on a sense of ease entering your mind and body. Click here to learn why we suggest this.

I know, it sounds like science fiction a little bit, but our world is a hell of a lot more mysterious and fascinating than much of our mainstream news and information lets on. A quick tour down the lane of post-material science returns many fascinating discoveries about superhuman abilities, extrasensory perception, remote viewing, non local consciousness and more. In short, we are extraordinary, and I believe science has shown this, even though mainstream culture lags behind in opening up to these ideas.

In a new study in The European Physical Journal C scientists are proposing the there exists a particle that can act as a portal to a fifth dimension. What exactly is the 5th dimension? Good question. Let’s start with what we know now about dimensions. To scientists there has been four known dimensions in our universe. Three that make up space (up and down, left and right, back and forth) this gives you “3D,” and a fourth dimension of time.

To understand the 5th dimension, we have to begin looking into dark matter, which is what scientists believe make up most of the mass in our universe. Dark matter happens to be something we don’t know too much about as well. We technically can’t see it, and so scientists measure what effects its mass has on other observable matter. In the most recent study the authors – Adrian Carmona, Javier Castellano Ruiz, Matthias Neubert – said their original intention was to “explain the possible origin of fermion (particle) masses in theories with a warped extra dimension”. They sketched out a new scalar associated with the fermion, which they claim is similar to the Higgs field and Higgs boson particle.

“We found that the new scalar field had an interesting, non-trivial behaviour along the extra dimension,” the researchers told VICE. “If this heavy particle exists, it would necessarily connect the visible matter that we know and that we have studied in detail with the constituents of dark matter, assuming the dark matter is composed out of fundamental fermions, which live in the extra dimension.”

In simpler terms, this new study suggests that the particle in question may be able to provide a greater explanation for dark matter, the more we know about dark matter, the more we can understand the finer workings of our unseen universe.

The authors described the particle as “a possible new messenger to the dark sector”.

The hard working is just beginning however. Scientists have to now isolate this particle. The Higgs boson particle mentioned above was spotted by the Large Hadron Collider (LHC), the world’s largest and most powerful particle accelerator. However it is not powerful enough to find this new particle and thus a new device would have to be created.

What intrigued me about this story was one of the statements physicists made about a new study they wrote exploring the potential of a 5th dimension:

“This new particle could play an important role in the cosmological history of the universe, and might produce gravitational waves that can be searched for with future gravitational-wave detectors.”

It’s always been my fascination to explore the deeper perennial questions that make up our current collective paradigms. As we understand more about the nature of the reality, the cosmos, and our relationship to it, we in essence are developing a greater understand of who we are.

My research over the years has taught me that many of the mainstream assumptions we make about ourselves and our world are likely false. Things like “consciousness originates in the brain” or “our consciousness cannot affect things non-locally” or “that the universe is random, and human consciousness cannot impact it.” From the many studies I’ve read exploring these subjects, the basic assumptions of modern materialist science simply don’t hold water when considering hundreds of studies telling a different story.

When you consider the paradigm shift that comes in realizing that our human consciousness may in fact have the ability to affect things non locally, something seen through hundreds of ‘intention experiments’ rigorously studied around the world, one has to think “what is the true nature of our reality and who we are? Are we a lot more extraordinary than we have been led to believe? Do our thoughts, intentions, and emotions have a greater impact on our lives than we realize? How might these changes in understanding who we are shift the way we live our lives?

Dive Deeper

These days, it’s not just knowing information and facts that will create change, it’s changing ourselves, how we go about communicating, and re-assessing the underlying stories, ideas and beliefs that form our world. We have to practice these things if we truly want to change. At Collective Evolution and CETV, this is a big part of our mission.

Amongst 100's of hours of exclusive content, we have recently completed two short courses to help you become an effective changemaker, one called Profound Realization and the other called How To Do An Effective Media Detox.

Join CETV, engage with these courses and more here!

Continue Reading

Alternative News

Scientists Successfully Perform A ‘Memory Transplant’ Between Living Organisms

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CE Staff Writer 12 minute read

In Brief

  • The Facts:

    A few years ago researchers discovered that memory can be transferred between, in this case, snails. The research changed the standard theory of memory and thoughts about how the brain remembers.

  • Reflect On:

    How much do we have yet to discover? Are we even physical beings? Could memories be stored beyond the physical world or what we can perceive with our senses? Can our we change our biology with our thoughts, feelings and emotions?

Before you begin...

Coherent icon

Take a moment and breathe. Place your hand over your chest area, near your heart. Breathe slowly into the area for about a minute, focusing on a sense of ease entering your mind and body. Click here to learn why we suggest this.

Make sure you follow Collective Evolution on Telegram as we have no idea how much longer we will be on Facebook.

Animal testing is extremely heartbreaking. All beings in my opinion, are intelligent, emotional, and have the ability to feel deeply. All life on this planet is so similar in so many ways. These days, living life forms are bred for experimentation and consumption, this not only harms the being in what some would perceive as an extreme act of cruelty, but in many cases it’s harming the integrity of our planet when it comes to environmental issues and human health as well. This is why I am always very conflicted when presenting information that’s discovered through some type of ‘testing’ that’s done on another being. There are other ways scientists can conduct studies without the use of live life forms.

The last time I was conflicted about sharing this type of information was when scientists injected aluminum into animals, mimicking the childhood vaccine schedule, to see what the difference between injected and ingested aluminum was and where it ends up in the body. You can read more about that topic here.

Theodora Capaldo is president of the New England Anti-Vivisection Society. Founded in 1895, NEAVS is a Boston-based, national animal advocacy organization dedicated to ending the use of animals in research, testing and science education. Through research, outreach, education, legislation, and policy change, NEAVS advocates for replacing animals with modern alternatives that are ethically, humanely and scientifically superior. It’s one of many organizations bringing alternatives to light. It’s a big time bioethics issue, and I just wanted to mention this before getting into the subject matter at hand.

What Happened: This may be old information to some, but I recently came across it. In 2018 a team of researchers successfully transplanted memories in snails by transferring a form of genetic information called RNA from one snail into another. The snails were trained to develop a response to a mild electric shock to their tails, after these shocks were administered the snails’ defensive withdrawal reflex – where the snails contract or curl up to protect themselves from harm – became more pronounced. Yes, again, this is extremely cruel, the thought of inflicting any type of pain or fear response in another living being is heartbreaking. But that’s just my opinion.

The snails exhibited a defensive contraction lasting about 50 seconds. The researchers extracted RNA from the nervous systems of the snails that had been shocked and injected the material into the snails that had not been shocked. RNA’s main role, from what we know (and there is a lot that we don’t know) is to serve as a messenger inside of cells, it carries protein-making instructions from DNA. When the RNA was injected into the unshocked snails, the snails also had the same type of response as shocked snails for an extended period of time after a soft touch, something they weren’t doing before. They were reacting to something that had never even happened to them. Control snails that received injections of RNA from snails that had not received shocks did not exhibit a response for as long.

It’s as if we transferred a memory. – Professor, Integrative Biology and PhysiologyNeurobiology at UCLA (source)

The researchers also showed that Aplysia sensory neurons in Petri dishes that had been shocked were more excitable if they were exposed to RNA from the shocked snails. Exposure to RNA from snails that had never been shocked did not cause the cells to become more excitable.

The results, said Glanzman, suggest that memories may be stored within the nucleus of neurons, where RNA is synthesized and can act on DNA to turn genes on and off. He said he thoughts memory storage involved these epigenetic changes – changes in the activity of genes and not in the DNA sequences that make up those genes – that are mediated by RNA (source)

It’s also interesting to note that Michael Levin at Tufts has replicated McConnell’s experiments on headless worms under more controlled settings.

Glanzman said one of McConnell’s students, Al Jacobson, demonstrated the transfer of memories between flatworms via RNA injections, coincidentally while an assistant professor at UCLA. The work was published in Nature in 1966 but Jacobsen never received tenure, perhaps because of doubts about his findings. The experiment was, however, replicated in rats shortly afterward. (source)

Another example,

Steve Ramirez, a 24-year-old doctoral student at the time, placed the mouse in a small metal box with a black plastic floor. Instead of curiously sniffing around, though, the animal instantly froze in terror, recalling the experience of receiving a foot shock in that same box. It was a textbook fear response, and if anything, the mouse’s posture was more rigid than Ramirez had expected. Its memory of the trauma must have been quite vivid.

Which was amazing, because the memory was bogus: The mouse had never received an electric shock in that box. Rather, it was reacting to a false memory that Ramirez and his MIT colleague Xu Liu had planted in its brain. (source)

What Does This Tell Us? Can Living Organisms Transfer Memory?  Yes, we already know that living organisms can transfer memory. For example, a Nature Neuroscience study published several years ago shows mice trained to avoid a smell passed their aversion on to their children as well as their grandchildren. This study dealt with phobia and anxiety research, as the animals were trained to fear a smell similar to cherry blossom. The researchers then looked at the mice’s sperm and found that the section of DNA responsible for sensitivity to the cherry blossom scent was much more active in the sperm. As a result, the offspring were “extremely sensitive” to cherry blossom and would avoid the scent despite never having experienced it in their lives. “The experience of a parent, even before conceiving, markedly influence both structure and function in the nervous system of subsequent generations,” the report concluded.

Research has since showed that ‘memories’ and behaviours may actually be passed down 14 generations.

This is very important, and it suggests that a number of ‘memories’ can be passed down from our previous generations, including fear, anxiety, trauma, perhaps susceptibility to substances like alcohol for example, and much more. This opens up a wide plethora of discussions when it comes to human behaviour in general.

What’s more important to recognize is that what’s encoded into our DNA and into our genes also has the ability to be changed using the power of our own mind. There is a lot of evidence emerging suggesting that thoughts, feelings and emotions can change our DNA. This also corroborates with the research posted above given the fact that emotions, like fear, are used. So my question is, what happens when the organism overcomes that fear, and does not react in the same way? What happens when it makes a conscious choice to perceive events in a different manner?

Imagine what love, peace and other “positive” emotions can do. If we can code fear, anxiety and trauma into our DNA and pass them on, can an organsm change that by changing themselves within and training themselves to experience more “joyful” type of experiences and/or mind/heart state?  Scientists have shown how the feeling of gratitude, for example, can literally change the structure of the human brain.

According to the HeartMath Institute,

The power of intentional thoughts and emotions goes beyond theory at the HeartMath Institute. In a study, researchers have tested this idea and proven its veracity.

HeartMath researchers have gone so far as to show that physical aspects of DNA strands could be influenced by human intention. The article, Modulation of DNA Conformation by Heart-Focused Intention – McCraty, Atkinson, Tomasino, 2003 – describes experiments that achieved such results.

For example, an individual holding three DNA samples was directed to generate heart coherence – a beneficial state of mental, emotional and physical balance and harmony – with the aid of a HeartMath technique that utilizes heart breathing and intentional positive emotions. The individual succeeded, as instructed, to intentionally and simultaneously unwind two of the DNA samples to different extents and leave the third unchanged.

“The results provide experimental evidence to support the hypothesis that aspects of the DNA molecule can be altered through intentionality,” the article states. “The data indicate that when individuals are in a heart-focused, loving state and in a more coherent mode of physiological functioning, they have a greater ability to alter the conformation of DNA.

“Individuals capable of generating high ratios of heart coherence were able to alter DNA conformation according to their intention. … Control group participants showed low ratios of heart coherence and were unable to intentionally alter the conformation of DNA.”

As far as memory goes, perhaps they are not even completely a product of our physical make-up? Who is to say that human consciousness, for example, resides in the brain? Perhaps there is a non-physical aspect, or a place we cannot perceive with our senses where memories and experiences are stored. After all, memories themselves, despite having physical characteristics as exemplified in this study, are in a sense themself non physical things. DNA has also been shown to have some non-physical aspects, you can read about one of many examples here.

The mind-body connection is also gaining traction,  As Garth Cook from Scientific American points out:

A growing body of scientific research suggests that our mind can play an important role in healing our body — or in staying healthy in the first place. . . There are now several lines of research suggesting that our mental perception of the world constantly informs and guides our immune system in a way that makes us better able to respond to future threats. That was a sort of ‘aha’ moment for me — where the idea of an entwined mind and body suddenly made more scientific sense than an ephemeral consciousness that’s somehow separated from our physical selves.

The mind body connection suggests that we can change our biology through belief, which suggests we can break the cycle of ‘negative’ aspects we’ve inherited through epigenetics. These types of interventions require a shift in human consciousness, a shift in perception.

Suggested reading: The Biology of Belief.

When it comes to learning about the mind-body connection and its relationship to our health, it can be difficult to choose a starting place amongst the vast and growing body of research; one of the best places to start, however, is the placebo effect, which demonstrates that the mind can create physiological changes in the body. Neuroscientist Fabrizio Benedetti explains:

There isn’t just one placebo effect, but many. Placebo painkillers can trigger the release of natural pain-relieving chemicals called endorphins. Patients with Parkinson’s disease respond to placebos with a flood of dopamine. Fake oxygen, given to someone at altitude, has been shown to cut levels of neurotransmitters called prostaglandins (which dilate blood vessels, among other things, and are responsible for many of the symptoms of altitude sickness.

This goes to show that based on our thoughts alone and how we perceive our environment, we can alter our biology.

Then there is the the idea that thoughts and human intention can alter physical systems. If thoughts can alter physical systems imagine what they can do to our own biology as well as the body of another. For more information this, you can read the publication titled “Distant Healing Intention Therapies: An Overview of the Scientific Evidence.”

There are also multiple credible reports of mind/matter interaction beyond the quantum scale, where we already know it exists. You read about one example here.

The Takeaway: At the end of the day, the evidence showing that our ‘memories’ can be transferred down many generations is quite strong. What seems to be left out of the mainstream conversation is the importance of our perceptions. Our environment, yes, plays a key role in shaping our biology, but we can begin to counteract the effect of our environment, especially if it is ‘negative,’ by changing our perception of that environment. We are not bound by the genetics we inherit from our ancestors, we can actively change them. If mice are trained to fear the smell of a certain substance, for example, yes their offspring also fear it but they are not doomed to that destiny. The mouse that can expand its consciousness, think, and realize that there is no reason to be afraid is the one that then changes their DNA.

The science of human consciousness, also known as non material science, is advancing quite rapidly, and it goes to show that if more of us can operate, or at least make an effort to operate from a place of peace within we can truly make the world a better place as well as transform our biology. The term “change comes from within” comes in many forms. If you look at the modern history of the human race, although there are many beautiful aspects and memories, there is also a lot of trauma. As a human collective we still have a lot of work to do on ourselves, and I believe we are currently going through that process and I believe it’s being triggered by the fact that more people are having a big change in how they perceive their environment.

Dive Deeper

These days, it’s not just knowing information and facts that will create change, it’s changing ourselves, how we go about communicating, and re-assessing the underlying stories, ideas and beliefs that form our world. We have to practice these things if we truly want to change. At Collective Evolution and CETV, this is a big part of our mission.

Amongst 100's of hours of exclusive content, we have recently completed two short courses to help you become an effective changemaker, one called Profound Realization and the other called How To Do An Effective Media Detox.

Join CETV, engage with these courses and more here!

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